Here's a little something you all probably didn't know about me, I grew up fast, and when I say fast, I mean... I did a lot of bad things at an early age, fell in love at an early age, and my maturity level was a bit higher than most (or so I hope it was, haha). Anyways, the point I'm trying to point here is that, falling in love at an early age(I believe it started at 14??), I was always in a relationship (& NO, I'm not bragging or am proud of this) but, I can only recall brief moments when I would be single for a very brief moment too. Anywho, my last relationship was a 4yr relationship, that ended mutually in 2011. & Here I am. It's March of 2013... It's been about a little over a year since I've been by myself, & I'm actually very happy being single. But I guess sometimes you just miss that someone being there for you...
So, last night.... I went out to my friends birthday party, & I usually go with my cousins but none of them were up for it. So instead, I asked a friend, let's call him "Jen" (he was given this name this night because his name starts with a J and is 3-letters long, and this girl accidentally called him "Jen," lol ). The funny thing is that I've only hung out with Jen like... two or three times before (bc I was still with my ex, so I barely went out) and we don't normally talk/text on a normal basis. SO, he decided to tag along because in is words, "I said I was gonna come hang out with you, so why not?" Anywho, we drunk... Exchange driving (I swore, I don't know how I managed to drive at all that night, please don't do this!) because we were both a bit intoxicated. The plan was to predrink at my friend's place and then bar hop in Mpls. Obviously, she got too drunk, so since she and her bf were riding with me and Jen, we went back to her place to drop them off.
I'm still unsure how Jen and I managed to get back to his place, but whoa... I still laugh at it now. LOL! The whole entire time while driving to places, we exchanged a few words, he grabbed my hands a few times, and stole kisses. We held many interesting conversations that I'd never expected to come from him.... Anyways, let's just cut the story short and say that I didn't get home till 5am (& NO, we didn't do anything) and since he was being a punk, I left my phone with him because it was late and I didn't feel like fighting for my phone, so I left it with him.
So here's the point of my story/night --- Why does this happen to me all the time? When I meet someone that I may have a thing for, I end up missing him the next day. Like, what happened last night felt like a dream to me. I can somewhat remember what happened, what we said to each other, his actions and mine.
Like...... Inside, I'm telling myself to not be this fool and don't download it so fast, that it's only a phase for the moment. But then again, I'm like.. No, it wasn't. But I don't know how to feel. However, I do know that these mixed emotions will disappear within a few days. It makes me sad because it reminds me of how good it feels to be wanted and to have someone make you feel good about yourself. I hate it when this happens to me, because I don't know what to think. But I tell myself, he probably does this to all girls... I shouldn't feel like I'm someone special, because who knows if he even means all that he's saying.... I'm not gonna lie, it felt really nice to know that someone, just someone..... gave you the attention you wanted and made you feel wanted; it felt really good and maybe that's the only reason why I woke up this morning realizing how much I missed this affection from someone of the opposite sex.
I know I'm not gonna let this night get the best of me, but.... It's just me feeling these emotions at the moment, and I know that it will soon disappear. I just had to get these thoughts out of my head because it's been bugging me this whole day. So, I'm gonna end it like this.....
Sometimes when we unexpectedly receive affection that we've always been familiar with, we are reminded by how nice it feels to feel this certain way. However, as good as it can get -- I'm gonna turn the opposite way and leave it as it is. I'm gonna let it be because I know this fairy tale has no happy ending. I didn't think I'd have a title for this post, but I guess I've came up with it just now --- Thank you for making me feel wanted, briefly. So...... Jen, thank you for a great night. Thanks for tagging along with me when everyone backed out on me. I had fun & I hope you did as well. What happened that night, we're gonna seal it shut because what happened in the car, stays there ;)
Good night love bugs.
PS- He did end up dropping off my phone the next morning. We talked for a short 5 minutes. & before leaving, he says..."It was fun, I hope we can do it again."
Last night with birthday girl and her people.
(& No, Jen isn't in the picture.)
Last night.
Because I'm nice.... I found some pictures and videos that Jen took in my phone, and here's a short clip of one of the videos. & Yes, you'll see and notice who Jen is. Enjoy :)
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=546048992092176&l=5853734513004751630
--& For the record, he's such a phony liar, I didn't take his keys! He took my wristlet and phone! Loser.
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